Monday, March 20, 2017

My third coffee.

It is quite a boring day. Despite not wanting, I did some doodling.

All weekend I was at home. Now in my cabin and having my third coffee. Life couldn't be more sad. I am  on second chapter of  The Great Gatsby by F. Scoot Fitgerald.

It seems like an engaging novel so far. The  movie adaptation was amazing, wasn't it. Now when I am reading he bokk , all those scenes are coming back to me. The head jewelry by ladies in the movie got quite caught on. We call it matha patti.

Hey, this post is not about this book.

But I wanna talk about  Gatsby.

Why he was such a fool?

Saturday, March 18, 2017

Random Post

I never thought writing a blog post would be a struggle. It is just that I am not writing much so I feel like little reluctant in writing the way  I write. It is like I have forgotten the blogging all together.

 I hope not. That's the place where I am I.

 And I want to blog frequently from now on. It is just work. I am too involved there.

My week was kinda horrible. And I don't wanna talk about it. Everything was overwhelming for me. In the end I learned some lessons :

Don't talk.
Don't get involved.
Don't except anything from anyone.
There is no such thing as friends in the adult life.
Pretend you are listening but don't listen.
Stay away from people.

Things get difficult for me because my lack of copping mechanism. I get lost. Give attention to non serious issues.  I know I shouldn't have given up yet. This is life.

My weekends are really boring. I want to go back to the class. It keeps me sane. After such a long time, I saw tele movie " Remember Sunday."

Saturday, March 4, 2017

Small Talk is not that small.

Karan Mahajan is bemused with American small talk ritual. In the New Yoker he writes that it took him a decade to master it.

Being a south Asian, I know where he i s coming from. What small talks he is talking about is mostly at shop counter's in the USA.

When your barista smiles and greets you, it has an effect. No one like grumpy sales person. It's a duty of a waiter to make you feel welcome. They gotta do business.

Be happy that there are people who are still smiling and saying hello, even in the name of customer service.

In our culture, people try to talk like they know you for ages. Sometimes it becomes compulsory to talk. And by mistake if you are not in the mood of deep talk they assume you rude.

 Karan says that" In the East, I’ve heard it said, there’s intimacy without friendship. In the West, there's friendship without intimacy."

To me, intimacy without friendship is way shallower than the small talk. It is not that something to be proud of. Friendship without intimacy means acquaintance.

Everyone is not your friend.

I personally don't believe in intimacy with strangers. There is no need either. You should have some friend with whom you can share your heart out. That's the way it should be. Friendship asks for hard work, patience, kindness and generosity. It starts with small talk and grow with time.

So smile often and say hello. You never know with whom you hit off.

Small talk is not that small. It has a rapport of being meaningless, shallow fake or instrumental conversation.

Lots of people find small talk useless. They believe its is formality and more customer oriented. However, it is just assumption.

No social interaction is useless.

The anthropologist Bronisław Malinowski coined the term phatic communion in his essay "The Problem of Meaning in Primitive Languages", which appeared in  cira 1920.
  Phatic communication is popularly known as small talk: the non referential use of language to share feelings or establish a mood of sociability rather than to communicate information or ideas.
In the current study, under title "  Is Efficiency Overrated?" it is stated that people who had a social interaction with a barista (i.e., smiled, made eye contact, and had a brief conversation) experienced more positive affect than people who were as efficient as possible.

Further, it is also found that initial evidence that these effects were mediated by feelings of belonging. These results suggest that, although people are often reluctant to have a genuine social interaction with a stranger, they are happier when they treat a stranger like a weak tie.

See ya !

Sunday, February 12, 2017

Life is good when you have no expectations.

This Feb 3, I turned 31. Life is better.  I am way mature. All my worries were because I wasn't letting things to go. I was too hopeful, show off and full with expectations.

And I was a fool.

Now, I understand that all I can do is "do my best. " No need to worry about each and everything. People I am spending time with are few and closed to my heart. And most probably they calm and relaxed in their own live. They are those smart people who have figured out their lives. They are settled. They don't react.

I still don't know which way to go. But, yeah !

Doing my best !

 I am done with my MS course work. Yaaay !!! Now thesis is here. It is a big thing for me. Winter is about to go which means I can long day hours, which means I could take more pics.

Saturday, January 7, 2017

My home is my heaven.

I got up bit relaxed. It's unusual. Most of the time there is some sadness and hoplessness. Today, there was nothing like that. I am loving home. It is a blessing to be in my heaven.